I need HELP!!

For those of you who have read or followed my blog, I make my plea. 

I. Need. Help!

Motivation that is. Many things have changed in my life since I dropped 40+ pounds. 

I have changed jobs, moved to a new house, and just gotten more stressed overall. I am unhappy with sooooo many things. I don't even want to get out of bed some mornings, never mind work out. And stress eat? OMG!!! Why is comfort food soooo yummy and bad for you? Did I mention that as a result I gained 50 pounds?! Yea! All the work I did and the progress that I made when whooshing down the proverbial toilet and here I am... fat, sad and begging for motivation! 

This week I have started something new to try and kick my butt into gear. I've been getting up at 4:30 am to get to the gym. It's early, but it's time that I have to myself. I can go to the gym, go home, shower and get ready for work, wake the kids up and get them ready, and get out the door. No stress! It's not easy getting up before the sun, but it's getting easier each day. 

My kids are starting to pick up on the "healthier food choice" which, in turn, is making it easier for me. They'd rather grab a piece of fruit instead of a popsicle when hanging by the pool. I love it. They motivate me. 

I can do the work and I have the drive, it's just very hard when you're doing it alone. That's where you come in. We're in this together. We don't have to do it alone. I want to be lighter, healthier and happier! 

xoxo

JiLL

So, I kicked myself in the ass!

This week is the first week that I've really been serious about the journey to weight loss and a healthier lifestyle. It's definitely not easy, but I know the will outcome be rewarding.

This morning, I went back and I looked at where I went wrong (aka gained 20 pounds). It started in December. Was it after gorging on Thanksgiving and slacking because of "the holidays"? Possibly and most likely.

It's almost a kick in the teeth to know that I worked so hard just to be set back by something so silly.

I'm back and better than ever! I am more determined [not so much motivated]. Occasionally, I feel as if I don't have the support that I need, but I know I need to be my own biggest supporter and motivator but it's hard.

There are a few people in my corner that I know will back me no matter what I do and I am truly thankful for that.

Here are the commitments I am making to myself:
Work out AT LEAST 3 times per week (at the gym, at home, etc.)
Involve my family in my healthy lifestyle (eating, exercise, etc.)
Drink more water
Eat little to no junk (chocolate is ALWAYS an exception LOL)
Keep alcohol to a minimum (2-3 beers or glasses of wine per week, if any at all)
No matter what, keep going!

I plan to use my blog, again, to hold myself accountable and record my thoughts, feelings, etc. I have found that when I have no one who understands what I'm going through, right this minute, I can record it and go back to it later. Weigh-ins will resume on Friday, March 2, 2012. I will also keep track of measurements as well.

Here's to it!
JiLL

Let's get serious for a minute...

This morning was rather depressing. I recorded my weight (ugh!!) and measurements (double ugh!!).

Cheese and rice! As good as that sounds, that's not part of the plan for right now! I am 4 days alcohol and cigarette free! I have attempted (again) to cut out the caffeine from my life, but that's not going to good. Ha! Today starts NOTHING but water with a cup (or 2) of coffee. 

I have decided, yet again, that I need to be serious about this if I wish to attain my goals.

Step 1: STOP DRINKING BEER YOU STUPID BITCH!! LOL As delicious as beer is, it's full of empty calories. One of my next blogs will be a list of beers and their calories so I (or you) can make a more conscious decision when choosing that wonderful beverage of barley and hops!

Step 2: STOP SMOKING CIGARETTES!! Again, this is just a big DUH!!! I won't get anywhere near my goal of running a 5k if I keep smoking.

Step 3: Make more conscious food choices!! I've got to get back to being more selective in the food that I eat and consuming less junk!

Step 4: Vitamins, water, exercise!! The essentials in any good plan to lose weight and get healthy. If I cannot utilize the gym, I need to get my ass out of bed at 5 am and start walking/jogging/running.

I've got to make an appointment with the doctor for a physical. I expect nothing else that the doctor telling me that I'm "obese", but perfectly healthy otherwise, as usual. Weigh-in and measurements will be done on Wednesdays from here on out and all food consumed and exercise will be tracked on myfitnesspal.com.

I have my goals... now to achieve them! My high school reunion is this year, October, I believe. That gives me 9 months. If I keep to the plan: 9 months x 4 weeks = 36 weeks x 2 lbs./week = 72 lbs.

Current Weight: 257.2 - 72 = 185.2 , 15 lbs. to ultimate goal of 170 lbs!

Gotta keep focused and not let ANYTHING hold me back!!

Slacking and procrastination = weight gain

Ok, so.... my last post was August 28, 2011. Exactly 4 months ago! I have slacked off, ate whatever I wanted, drank whatever I wanted and procrastinated. I'm a little disappointed in myself. I worked so hard to lose the weight and took only 4 months to put a good chunk back on. I held the keys in my hands and I just let it go.

I have been trying to kick myself in the ass to get back to it. It's been really hard without any motivation. My thought is: why do I need motivation now? I didn't have a workout buddy before? Why is this so important? I don't know.

No matter. A new year = a new me! Nothing going to stop me now!!! I can do this... and with the help of a couple of friends, I'll do it!!

LAST BLOG UPDATE
Weight: 242.8
BMI: 36.9

TODAY 12/28/11
Weight: 259.4
BMI: 39.4
POUNDS GAINED: 16.6


GOAL WEIGHT: 170
Pounds to goal: 89.4

Major set back won't set me back!!

If you read my blog from the 14th, you will know that there was already a set back in my weight loss journey. For whatever reason, the month of August has been full of major temptation and no motivation. I ate way more than I should have and ate plenty of food that I should NOT have. I barely set foot in the gym at all this month. I believe I've gained at least five pounds, but won't know for sure until tomorrow's re-start weigh-in. 

To be honest, I am really disappointed in myself. For some time, I was gung-ho and really into what I was doing. The only person I've hurt is myself. This is the beginning of a new week and a new outlook on weight loss. It's time for me to get my ass in gear and get back to what's important,,, and that's being healthy for me and my family. 

I hate the way I've been feeling: no energy/motivation, bloated and constipated. NOT a great feeling. It's definitely time to change again!

Here's to a new start!!

Gillian <3

I'm back and better than ever!!

These last two weeks have been particularly trying for me. I've been dealing with a lot of stressful things between work, family, finances, etc. All of it together totally killed my motivation to work out and caused me to binge eat. Last week was my boyfriend's birthday and our anniversary. There was amazing home made food from one of his co-workers and his mother & sister. All was delicious and of course I overdid it. I managed to get my workout in and keep my water consumption up. My body is totally feeling the ill effects of going back to not so healthy foods.

My goal was to be at 235 by September 1. I am currently 244. I gained 2 pounds this week. :o(

I have 17 days to drop 9 pounds. I can do it as long as I keep my focus and give my all!

I can do this!!
Gillian <3

Photo Update!

For all my followers:

I almost forgot to post my photo update! The transformation to this point is quite amazing!

February 2010 - My brother's wedding 286.6 lbs.

August 2011 - Going out 242.8 pounds